简单的英语小短文

1. 英语小短文（优美的，简短的）

!Inthemorning，。Intheafternoon，Iwenttoaparkwithmybestfriends。Thereweremanyflowers，andsomebirdsweresingingsongs。。Atlast，wewenthomefordinner。Today，Ihadagreattime！

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翻译：这天是星期天，我十分高兴!早上，我呆在家里做作业看电视。下午，我和我最好的朋友去了公园。那里有许多花儿，一些鸟还在唱歌呢、我们一齐玩游戏，谈论我们的梦想。最后，我们就回家吃晚饭了。这天玩的真的很开心！

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2. 英语小短文20字简单

There is a park near my home.There are a lot of beautiful trees,flowersand birds in the park.So many people go to the park to enjoy theirweekends.They like walking or having a picnic in the park.But I like flying akite with my sisiter there. 我家附近有一个公园。哪里有很多美丽的树、花和小鸟。所以很多人都喜欢到那里去度周末。他们喜欢在公园里散步或是野餐.但是我喜欢和我姐姐在那里放风筝。

3. 最简单英语作文

1.Yesterday was my birthday, so some of my classmates sent me presents. Mother prepared a tea party for me. I invited all of them to come and take part in it.The tea party began at half past six. There were cold drinks and refreshments. We ate, talked and laughed. We felt that we were the happiest men in the world
昨天是我生日,所以有几位我的同班同学送我礼.母亲给我准备一个茶会.我邀请他们都前来参加.茶会下午六点半开始.有冷饮和点心.我们又吃又谈又笑.我们觉得是世界上最快乐的人..
2.I like the Chinese new year better than any other festival. This is a time especially for rest and joy. I need not study. I wear good clothes and eat good food. I have a good time from morning till night. I am as happy as a king.
我喜欢中国新年比喜欢其它任何节日更甚.这是一个专为休息和欢乐的时间.我不需要读书.我穿好衣服,吃好东西.我每天从早到晚日子过得轻松愉快.我和上帝一样快乐.
3.No sooner had the witer vacation begun than I returned to my native town. Of course I
must make good use of it;.In the morning I reviewed my lessons and read newspapers or magazines. In the afternoon I played ball games with my friends or went fishing in the river. At night I watched television with my family. hardly had the clock on the wall struck ten when I went to bed.
寒假刚一开始,我就回故乡了.自然我须好好利用它. 早晨我复习功课并阅读报纸或杂志.下午我和朋友打球,或去河中钓鱼.晚上我就和家人看看电视.墙上的钟刚敲十下,我就去睡觉了.
4.I live very happily today! In the morning, it is very fine! Then I climb the mountain with family, the air on the mountain is very fresh, the flowers plants and trees on the mountain all seem extremely beautiful. Coming back home in the evening, family and I sat and watched TV together, we are returning and eating the fruit while chatting, the whole family is happy and harmonious!
今天我过得非常开心!早上,天气非常好!于是我和家人一起去登山,山上的空气非常清新,山上的花草树木都显得格外美丽.晚上回到家,我与家人坐在一起看电视,我们还一边聊天一边吃着水果,全家其乐融融!

4. 简单的英文短文

1.Yesterday was my birthday, so some of my classmates sent me presents. Mother prepared a tea party for me. I invited all of them to come and take part in it.The tea party began at half past six. There were cold drinks and refreshments. We ate, talked and laughed. We felt that we were the happiest men in the world
昨天是我生日，所以有几位我的同班同学送我礼。母亲给我准备一个茶会。我邀请他们都前来参加。茶会下午六点半开始。有冷饮和点心。我们又吃又谈又笑。我们觉得是世界上最快乐的人。。

2.I like the Chinese new year better than any other festival. This is a time especially for rest and joy. I need not study. I wear good clothes and eat good food. I have a good time from morning till night. I am as happy as a king.
我喜欢中国新年比喜欢其它任何节日更甚。这是一个专为休息和欢乐的时间。我不需要读书。我穿好衣服，吃好东西。我每天从早到晚日子过得轻松愉快。我和上帝一样快乐。

3.No sooner had the witer vacation begun than I returned to my native town. Of course I
must make good use of it;.In the morning I reviewed my lessons and read newspapers or magazines. In the afternoon I played ball games with my friends or went fishing in the river. At night I watched television with my family. hardly had the clock on the wall struck ten when I went to bed.
寒假刚一开始，我就回故乡了。自然我须好好利用它。 早晨我复习功课并阅读报纸或杂志。下午我和朋友打球，或去河中钓鱼。晚上我就和家人看看电视。墙上的钟刚敲十下，我就去睡觉了。

4.I live very happily today! In the morning, it is very fine! Then I climb the mountain with family, the air on the mountain is very fresh, the flowers plants and trees on the mountain all seem extremely beautiful. Coming back home in the evening, family and I sat and watched TV together, we are returning and eating the fruit while chatting, the whole family is happy and harmonious!
今天我过得非常开心！早上，天气非常好！于是我和家人一起去登山，山上的空气非常清新，山上的花草树木都显得格外美丽。晚上回到家，我与家人坐在一起看电视，我们还一边聊天一边吃着水果，全家其乐融融！

5. 用最简单最简单的英语写一篇小短文

The 2010 Gulf of Mexico oil spill is the worst environmental disaster in history. It was caused by the explosion of an oil rig "Deepwater Horizon", which lead to 11 rig workers' death. Both of the economic and environmental damages were huge. Oil company BP is now facing a fine and clean up cost of up to 30 billion dollars. The incident was the biggest of its kind and making energy thrist the USA has to think twice before allowing other oil companies to drill again in the deep water around its coasts.

我也是选了2010年墨西哥湾漏油事件，大约一百词，应该不会太难，若有不明之处，或要修改，请尽管提出。
另外为了给你有更多选择，我又写了日本2011年的地震引起的福岛第一原子力発电厂事故的大灾虽。

An earthquake in Japann on March 11, 2011 caused a tsunami. The tidal wave swallowed a large part of the eastern part of Japan. Numerous of people were killed and tens of thousands were made homeless. The worst thing of the incident was the Fukushima nuclear disaster, which because of the earthquake that had damaged the power plants. A series of equipment failures, nuclear meltdown and releases of radioactive materials into the air, It was the largest nuclear disaster since the Chernobyl disaster of 1986.

我还有第3个选择给你呢，那便是北极冰圈受温室效果影响，导致北极熊的生态环境被严重损害。

Air pollution has now caused serious problem to the environment, the so called greenhouse effects, which harmful gasses had been released into the atmosphere and damaged the ozone, a direct result of melting the Arctic ice. Indirectly, makes the polar bears having a very hard time for their survival. They have lost their hunting grounds, many have to swim long distance from one ice block to the other. Number of young cubs died ring these voyages. So they are now facing a big threat to their survival.

6. 简单的英语小短文

第一篇：'m
tong
tong
,i'm
12
years
old
.there
are
three
people
in
my
family
----my
father
,my
mother
and
i
.in
summer,
i
like
swimming.
in
fall,
i
like
flying
kites
.
in
winter
,
i
like
making
a
snowman
.
in
spring
,
i
like
planting
trees.i
like
singing
and
dancing
.
can
you
tell
me
,
what
about
you.
第二篇:i
am
li
kai.
i
was
bron
in
1995,that
is
to
say
,
i
am
eleven
years
old
this
year.
i
am
a
pupil
from
class3
,grade
6
in
the
primary
school.myfavourite
persons
are
teachers.because
they
teach
us
knowledge.
teachers
let
us
understand
the
world.
第三篇：我的英语老师my
english
teacher
in
my
life,
ms.
wang
is
the
most
important
person
to
me.
her
teaching
skills
are
diverse.
in
class,
she
usually
uses
games
and
posters.
she
works
hard
for
us.
when
other
teachers
rest,
she
still
keeps
working
and
working.
when
we
are
mischievous,
第四篇：save
water
保护水资源
water
is
very
important
for
us.
we
must
drink
water
everyday.
we
can’t
live
without
water.
water
is
everywhere
around
us.
at
home,
we
use
water
to
wash
clothes,
to
wash
dishes,
to
cook
rice,
to
clean
the
flat,
to
have
showers,
to
make
drinks,
to
cle
第五篇：i
like
chinese
new
year
very
much.
i
can
meet
many
many
friends
in
my
family.
i
like
them
very
much.
we
sit
together
to
have
dinner,
i
like
the
food,
it's
very
nice.
do
you
know
what
is
lucky
money?
it
is
the
money
children
get
from
aunt
and
uncles,
grandpa
grandma.
i've
got
a
lot
this
year!
i
love
chinese
new
year.
i
hope
you
will
like
it
too.
第六篇：i
have
a
small
bedroom.there
are
only
a
small
bed,a
small
desk
and
a
small
chair
in
the
room.and
there
is
a
beautiful
doll
on
my
blue
bed.everyday
i
do
my
homework,read
books
and
play
games
with
the
doll
in
my
bedroom.it
is
small,but
it
gives
me
much
happiness.
第七篇：my
father
is
a
tall
and
handsome
man.he
is
a
policeman.
everyday
he
comes
back
home
very
late,because
he
must
help
the
others.he
doesn't
have
time
to
examine
my
homework
and
take
me
to
the
park.but
i
like
my
father,because
he
is
a
good
policeman.
第八篇：there
is
a
park
near
my
home.there
are
a
lot
of
beautiful
trees,flowers
and
birds
in
the
park.so
many
people
go
to
the
park
to
enjoy
their
weekends.they
like
walking
or
having
a
picnic
in
the
park.but
i
like
flying
a
kite
with
my
sisiter
there.
第九篇：japan
was
fun.
it
was
very
cool
and
windy.
we
flew
kites
in
the
park.
i
bought
a
watch
there.
i
wanted
to
buy
more,
but
i
didn't
have
money.
the
gardens
there
were
beautiful.
i
very
liked
the
gardens
.
the
japan
department
stores
were
too
big.
i
couldn't
find
mom.
the
food
was
delicious.
we
ate
a
lot
of
fish。
i
also
liked
the
vegetables
and
cake
there.
i
hope
i
can
go
to
japan
one
more
time.
第十篇：last
sunday,
i
visited
my
grandmother.
we
listened
to
music
and
planted
flowers.
i
counted
the
flowers.
there
were
ten..
then
i
helped
my
grandmother
cook
lunch.
when
we
finished,
i
washed
the
dishes
and
she
cleaned
the
kitchen.
in
the
evening,
i
watched
tv
and
played
the
violin
at
home,
it
was
fun.
希望楼主采纳
谢谢！

7. 谁有简单又比较短的英语小短文

【英语小短文】

My Father
My father is very nice. He works in a hospital , he is a doctor,he is thirty—seven years old. He’s tall and fat , He has short black hair .He has big eyes , a small nose and a big mouth . He likes watching TV and playing basketball . His favorite colour is blue . He is my great father , I like him .

红色是我新学会的两个单词：
great：伟大的、优秀的
him：他

【译文】

我的爸爸
我的爸爸非常好。他在医院上班，他是医生，他今年三十七岁，长得又高又胖。他有短短的黑头发，长着大大的眼睛，一个小鼻子和一个大嘴巴。他喜欢看电视和打篮球。他最喜欢的颜色是蓝色。他是我最棒的爸爸，我喜欢他！

8. 简单英语小短文50字左右

第一篇：'m Tong tong ,I'm 12 years old .There are three people in my family ----my father ,my mother and I .In summer, I like swimming. In fall, I like flying kites . In winter , I like making a snowman . In spring , I like planting trees.I like singing and dancing . Can you tell me , what about you.

第二篇:I am Li Kai. I was bron in 1995,that is to say , I am eleven years old this year. I am a pupil from Class3 ,Grade 6 in the primary school.Myfavourite persons are teachers.Because they teach us knowledge. Teachers let us understand the world.

第三篇：我的英语老师My English Teacher
In my life, Ms. Wang is the most important person to me. Her teaching skills are diverse. In class, she usually uses games and posters. She works hard for us. When other teachers rest, she still keeps working and working. When we are mischievous,

第四篇：Save Water 保护水资源
Water is very important for us. We must drink water everyday. We can’t live without water. Water is everywhere around us. At home, we use water to wash clothes, to wash dishes, to cook rice, to clean the flat, to have showers, to make drinks, to cle

第五篇：I like Chinese New Year very much. I can meet many many friends in my family. I like them very much. We sit together to have dinner, I like the food, it's very nice.
Do you know what is lucky money? It is the money children get from aunt and uncles, grandpa grandma. I've got a lot this year!
I love Chinese New Year. I hope you will like it too.

第六篇：I have a small bedroom.There are only a small bed,a small desk and a small chair in the room.And there is a beautiful doll on my blue bed.Everyday I do my homework,read books and play games with the doll in my bedroom.It is small,but it gives me much happiness.

第七篇：My father is a tall and handsome man.He is a policeman. Everyday he comes back home very late,because he must help the others.He doesn't have time to examine my homework and take me to the park.But I like my father,because he is a good policeman.

第八篇：There is a park near my home.There are a lot of beautiful trees,flowers and birds in the park.So many people go to the park to enjoy their weekends.They like walking or having a picnic in the park.But I like flying a kite with my sisiter there.

第九篇：Japan was fun. It was very cool and windy. We flew kites in the park. I bought a watch there. I wanted to buy more, but I didn't have money. The gardens there were beautiful. I very liked the gardens . The japan department stores were too big. I couldn't find Mom. The food was delicious. We ate a lot of fish。 I also liked the vegetables and cake there. I hope I can go to Japan one more time.

第十篇：Last Sunday, I visited my grandmother. We listened to music and planted flowers. I counted the flowers. There were ten.. Then I helped my grandmother cook lunch. When we finished, I washed the dishes and she cleaned the kitchen. In the evening, I watched TV and played the violin at home, It was fun.

9. 简单的英语小短文100字

One good turn deserves another
I was having dinner at a restaurant whenHarry Steele came in. Harry worked in a lawyer's office years ago, but he is now working at a bank. He gets a good salary, but he always borrows money from his friends and never pays it back. Harry saw me and came and sat at the same table. He has never borrowed money from me. While he was eating, I asked him to lend me &2. To my surprise, he gave me the money immediately. 'I have never borrrowed any money from you,' Harry said,'so now you can pay for my dinner!'
我正在一家饭馆吃饭，托尼.斯蒂尔走了进来。托尼曾在又家律师事务所工作，而现在正在一家银行上班，他的薪水很高，但他却总是向朋友借钱，并且从来不还。托尼看见了我，就走过来和我坐到一张桌子前。他从未向我借过钱，但他吃饭时，我提出向他借20英镑。令我惊奇的是，他立刻把钱给了我。“我还未向你借过钱。”托尼说道，“所以现在你可以替我付饭钱了！”

好消息＆坏消息！
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings currently on display. "I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all fifteen of your paintings."
"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What's the bad news?". With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The guy was your doctor."

Difference

"I can always tell a graate class from an undergraate class," observed the instructor in one of my graate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles. "When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graate students just write it down."
区 别

“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”

Charge for Bread and Butter

Some years ago, my dad, an attorney, took me to a fancy restaurant in Now York City. When the bill arrived, there was a $1.50 charge for bread and butter. Dad paid the bill, including the charge for bread and butter. However, the next day, he sent a letter to the resturant stating that the charge was uncalled for. Enclosed in the same envelope was a bill for $500 in legal services.

Someone from the restaurant called immediately and asked, "What is this $500 bill for? We never ordered any legal services."

Dad replied, "I never ordered any bread and butter."

The $1.50 was returned without delay.
面包和黄油费

几年前，我当律师的爸爸带我去纽约的一家高档餐馆。帐单上来时，上面有1.5美元的面包和黄油费。爸爸付了帐，连同面包和黄油的收费一齐付了。但是第二天，他给餐馆寄了一封信，说那项收费是没有道理的。随信还寄上了一张500美元的法律服务机构的收费单。

餐馆马上打来电话，问道：“这500美元的收费单是怎么回事？我们从来没有要什么法律机构的服务。”

爸爸答道，“我也从来没有要什么面包和黄油。”

那1.5美元立即就寄了回来。

Sleeping Pills

Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.

Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."

"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"
安眠药

鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。

星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”
“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？”

At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.

His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.

"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled. "You missed!"

"Ah," replied the swordsman, "you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father."

世界上最伟大的击剑手

在一场世界最佳击剑手表演中，排名第三的击剑手上场了。一只苍蝇放了出来，剑划了一个弧，他将苍蝇劈成了两半。观众欢呼起来。紧接着排名第二的人将一只苍蝇切成了四半。现场一阵沉默，人们期盼着世界上最伟大的击剑手出场。

他的剑锋以一个巨大的弧线划了下来－－然而那只昆虫还在继续飞行!观众被惊呆了。最伟大的击剑手完全错过了他的目标，然而他还在微笑着。

“你为什么这么高兴？”有人嚷道，“你没击中!”

“啊，”剑手答道，“你刚才没有很仔细地看。苍蝇还活着，是的－－但他永远也做不成爸爸了。”

The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.

Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."

【译文】

老猫

一位老妇有只猫，这只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了东西，因为它年纪太大了。一天，老猫发现一只老鼠，它跳过去抓这只老鼠，然而，它咬不住这只老鼠。因此，老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了，因为老猫咬不了它。

于是，老妇很生气，因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫，猫说：“不要打你的老仆人，我已经为你服务了很多年，而且还愿意为你效劳，但是，我实在太老了，对年纪大的不要这么无情，要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, "I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the st.

He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, "I cannot go to the rich man's house today, for I cannot get over the river."

He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the st and eat them.

Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.

【译文】

一个人正朝着一个富人的房子走去，当他沿着路走时，在路的一边他发现一箱好苹果，他说：“我不打算吃那些苹果，因为富人会给我更多的食物，他会给我很好吃的东西。”然后他拿起苹果，一把扔到土里去。

他继续走，来到河边，河涨水了，因此，他到不了河对岸，他等了一会儿，然后他说：“今天我去不了富人家了，因为我不能渡过河。”

他开始回家，那天他没有吃东西。他就开始去找吃的，他找到苹果，很高兴地把它们从尘土中翻出来吃了。

不要把好东西扔掉，换个时候你会觉得它们大有用处。

The City Mouse and the Country Mouse

Once there were two mice. They were friends. One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city. After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said, "Do come and see me at my house in the country." So the City mouse went. The City mouse said, "This food is not good, and your house is not good. Why do you live in a hole in the field? You should come and live in the city. You would live in a nice house made of stone. You would have nice food to eat. You must come and see me at my house in the city."

The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse. It was a very good house. Nice food was set ready for them to eat. But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise. The City mouse cried, " Run! Run! The cat is coming!" They ran away quickly and hid.

After some time they came out. When they came out, the Country mouse said, "I do not like living in the city. I like living in my hole in the field. For it is nicer to be poor and happy, than to be rich and afraid."

【译文】

城里老鼠和乡下老鼠

从前，有两只老鼠，它们是好朋友。一只老鼠居住在乡村，另一只住在城里。很多年以后，乡下老鼠碰到城里老鼠，它说：“你一定要来我乡下的家看看。”于是，城里老鼠就去了。乡下老鼠领着它到了一块田地上它自己的家里。它把所有最精美食物都找出来给城里老鼠。城里老鼠说：“这东西不好吃，你的家也不好，你为什么住在田野的地洞里呢？你应该搬到城里去住，你能住上用石头造的漂亮房子，还会吃上美味佳肴，你应该到我城里的家看看。”

乡下老鼠就到城里老鼠的家去。房子十分漂亮，好吃的东西也为他们摆好了。可是正当他们要开始吃的时候，听见很大的一阵响声，城里的老鼠叫喊起来：“快跑！快跑！猫来了！”他们飞快地跑开躲藏起来。

过了一会儿，他们出来了。当他们出来时，乡下老鼠说：“我不喜欢住在城里，我喜欢住在田野我的洞里。因为这样虽然贫穷但是快乐自在，比起虽然富有却要过着提心吊胆的生活来说，要好些。”

从这么多里挑一篇吧。望采纳！

10. 要英语小短文，带翻译的，简单一点点，谢谢了！

英文幽默故事：
There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000. The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is $5,000? That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?” The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?” The owner of the shopsaid, “I don’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call him ‘The Boss.’”
老板最大 有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉，其中一只卖五千元，另一只卖一万元，还有一只卖三万元。顾客问老板：「为什么这只要卖五千元？这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了！」老板说：「因为我有训练他讲话。」顾客又问：「那这只呢？他会做什么？为什么要卖这么贵？」老板说：「他除了会说话之外，还会表演一些有趣的动作，好比说跳舞等等，所以才卖这么贵。」顾客接着又问：「那第三只呢？他会做什么？为什么要卖这么贵？」老板说：「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌，也没看过他跳舞，什么都没有！不过另外两只叫他：『老板！』」

Where is the egg?
Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?
Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.
Teacher:Then where is the “egg"?
Student:In the cake,Sir.
鸡蛋在哪里？
老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？
学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。
老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？
学生：在蛋糕里，先生

Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket. But a girl asks him,“Why do you buy so many tickets? How many friends do you meet?” “No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.”
汤姆是个小孩， 他才7岁。 当他去电影院的时候。那时他第一次去。他买了张票进去了。 但没过两三分钟他就出来了，然后买了第二张票又进去了。 几分钟后他又出来买了第三张票。 接着两三分钟后他又出来买票。 一个女的问她，“你为什么要买那么多票啊? 你见到了几个朋友？" "没有， 我里面没朋友， 但是每当我进门的时候一位大的女人老把我的票给剪了"

Child:My uncle has 1000 men under him.
Man:He is really somebody.What does do?
Child:A maintenance man in a cemetery
他真是一个大人物
小孩：我叔叔下面有1000个人。
男人：他真是一个大人物。他是干什么的？
小孩：墓地守墓人。

Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?
Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.
一名伟人
老师：如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗？
学生：当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到400多岁。

Mr. Smith: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.
Waiter: Yes, sir, I know---it's the heat that kills it.
史密斯先生：服务员，我的汤里有一只死苍蝇．
服务员：是的，先生，我知道了，它是被烫死的．

Son: Dad, give me a dime.
Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?
Son: I guess you're right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you?
儿子：爸爸，给我一角钱。
父亲：儿子，你不认为你已经长大了，不该再老是一角一角地要钱了(该自立了)，不是吗？
儿子：爸爸，我想你是对的，那给我一块钱行吗？

A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they’re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight-year-oldkid came back home and asked his father, “Father, is it expensive to be married?” And the father said, “Yes, son, it is very expensive.” So the son asked, “How much does it cost?” And the father said, “I don’t know, son. I’m still paying.”
有个小孩爱上了另一个小孩，对方是学校的同学。八岁或十岁左右的孩子有时会迷恋班上某个人，然后就以为自己恋爱了。因此这个八岁的小孩回家问他爸爸：「爸爸，结婚很花钱吗？」爸爸说：「是啊，儿子，非常花钱。」儿子又问：「要花多少钱呢？」爸爸说：「我不知道，儿子，我到现在还一直在付钱啊！」

"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?" "No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？”
“没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”

“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”

TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?
John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.
老师：我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子？
约翰：嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。

The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了？”
“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。
“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, "I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the st. He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, "I cannot go to the rich man's house today, for I cannot get over the river." He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the st and eat them. Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.
【译文】 一个人正朝着一个富人的房子走去，当他沿着路走时，在路的一边他发现一箱好苹果，他说：“我不打算吃那些苹果，因为富人会给我更多的食物，他会给我很好吃的东西。”然后他拿起苹果，一把扔到土里去。 他继续走，来到河边，河涨水了，因此，他到不了河对岸，他等了一会儿，然后他说：“今天我去不了富人家了，因为我不能渡过河。” 他开始回家，那天他没有吃东西。他就开始去找吃的，他找到苹果，很高兴地把它们从尘土中翻出来吃了。 不要把好东西扔掉，换个时候你会觉得它们大有用处。

A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”

Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一块儿回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”

Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills. Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"

安眠药
鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。
星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”
“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？”