英语搞笑小品

❶ 英语搞笑小品

中小学英语剧本文章列表
[中小学英语剧本]龟兔赛跑 佚名 12-06
[中小学英语剧本]Pull up the turnip 佚名 12-06
[中小学英语剧本]远 离 网 吧Keep Away From the Net 佚名 12-06
[中小学英语剧本]The Ugly Duckling 佚名 12-06
[中小学英语剧本]《白雪公主》英语童话剧 佚名 09-18
[中小学英语剧本]AprilFool'sDay 佚名 04-03
[中小学英语剧本]玛菲女儿《吐蕃来使求娶文成公主》（独幕剧） 小吗啡（… 12-08
[中小学英语剧本]英语短剧： The Tortoise and the Hare（龟兔赛跑） 尚丽娟（… 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]英语短剧：The Fox and the Tiger（狐假虎威） 尚丽娟（… 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]英语童话剧：白雪公主<剧本> 佚名 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]儿童英语剧本Little Red coat 佚名 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]英语表演剧本--小狮子找食物 佚名 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]英语小品剧本-----小红帽 佚名 11-27
[中小学英语剧本]英文小品The Ants and the Picnic 佚名 11-10
[中小学英语剧本]Jungle Story 张宇 11-10
[中小学英语剧本]The Three Bears 张宇 11-10
[中小学英语剧本]Little Red Riding Hood 张宇 11-10
[中小学英语剧本]Cinderella 张宇 11-10
[中小学英语剧本]Little Duck 佚名 11-10
http://www.coffbar.com/Article/midpre/midpren/Index.html

❷ 英语小品

http://..com/question/48351029.html

v 英文剧本 Legend of phoenix (2007-09-06 21:36:03)
v 英文电影剧本 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2007-09-06 21:35:00)
v 英语短剧剧本The Pocket Money (2007-06-30 10:48:31)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 孙悟空vs猪八戒 (2007-03-30 12:03:58)
v 《孔雀东南飞》（英文搞笑话剧） (2007-03-30 12:03:58)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 英语剧本买药 (2007-03-30 12:03:57)
v 英语小品剧本 -- The Pocket Money (2007-03-30 12:03:57)
v 英语小剧本-----小红帽 (2007-03-30 12:03:56)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 貂禅 (2007-03-30 12:03:56)
v 英语表演剧本--小狮子找食物 (2007-03-30 12:03:54)
v 英语童话剧：白雪公主<剧本> (2007-03-30 12:03:54)
v 英语小品剧本-- 英语剧本买药 (2007-03-30 12:03:53)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 英语剧本 魔豆 (2007-03-30 12:03:53)
v 英语小品剧本 -- Big words of western tour （大话西游） (2007-03-30 12:03:52)
v 英语小品剧本 -- Learn to love (2007-03-30 12:03:52)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 防空洞英文剧本 (2007-03-30 12:03:51)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 男孩和他的树>----中英文 (2007-03-30 12:03:51)
v 英语小品 Another day in paradise (2007-03-30 12:03:50)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 英语话剧剧本●傻子春天 (2007-03-30 12:03:50)
v 英语短剧：Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (2007-03-30 12:03:49)
v 英语短剧：The Fox and the Tiger（狐假虎威） (2007-03-30 12:03:49)
v 英语小品剧本 -- The Gifts （礼物） (2007-03-30 12:03:47)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 音乐剧：Peter and the Wolf （彼德与狼） (2007-03-30 12:03:47)
v 英语小品剧本 -- 英语话剧《新梁祝外传》剧本 (2007-03-30 12:03:46)
v 英语小品剧本 -- THE MASK 面膜 (2007-03-30 12:03:46)
下面的网址有好多,你找找//
http://www.hxen.com/yingyujuben/
参考资料：http://www.hxen.com/yingyujuben/

❸ 英语搞笑小品剧本（要简单点）

12分钟好象有点长，我这里有我参加“星星火炬英语风采大赛”的剧本。参考一下额
Time ancient times. Character Mister Dongguo, wolf, hunter, old
apricot tree, Lao Niu, old farmer." In wilderness the mist and st is
billowing, shouts the acoustic shock day. In shouted that, " fight wolves!pursues (a wolf belt arrow wound to go on stage)
wolf: I originally am
come from the north wolf, but in today the arrow was injured (wolf
lamely to run) [ Mister Dongguo to carry on the book pouch, on the one
hand walks on the other hand self-effacingly recites poetry.)
Guo: From a pot of wine among the flowers
I drank alone. There was no one with me --
Till, raising my cup, I asked the bright moon
To bring me my shadow and make us three.

(Between the flower a pot liquor, drinks alone without the intimate.
Raises glass invites the bright moonlight, becomes three people to the
shade) (suddenly to discover on road crowd of ants, heart of the
mercy, has lifted a foot does not enre to lay down)
Guo: (Reads)
walks not injuries the cricket 蚁命 manner to have to have the mercy
heart (cautiously to bypass ant, after continues to lead the way)
(field shout big quake)
Guo: What happened next? The United States
military has joined battle with Iraq? (Wolf runs has come up) the
wolf: The alt saves a life, behind had a hunter to have to peel my
skin, rescued me!
Guo: Good good, is the person to want to be sincere
(was saying behind, dismounts the package, all but actually came out
the inside book)
Guo: You first hide in this package (wolf lamely
sneak in package) (Mister Dongguo to carry book pouch, continues to
walk) (on hunter) the hunter asks
Guo: Ask scholar's, has seen the
wolf which was injured to pass a moment ago?
Guo: Not.
Hunter: Thanks
gentleman. After (under hunter) (waits hunter to walk far, Mister
Dongguo put wolf from book pouch has gotten down)

Guo: The hunter walked, you in a big hurry escape the
wolf: Is
not I does not want to walk, I really am tired hungry
Guo: What then
you do want to eat?
Wolf: I must eat your meat! ! (Reveals fierce and antagonistic
expression)
Guo: Why then you do want to eat me? I have graciousness
and you

Wolf: Because you me stuffily in book pouch too long
Guo:
Really is the good intention not good newspaper. Is not good, I must
go ask the person to figure out! (Said, brings wolf to go) (to walk to
an old tree under)
Guo: Sets up eldest sister, I rescued the wolf, the
wolf have actually had to eat me. You to me comment this principle!
Tree: Should eat! (Wolf self-satisfied has smiled) the tree: Your
humanity endlessly cutted the piece of trees, continually our these old trees do
not let off, burns us with the fire. Why can't the wolf eat you? Ate
you to be able few indivial to damage the nature (under old tree,
wolf slowly approached Mister Dongguo) (by now on cow)
Guo: Holds on a minute, lets me ask Niu eldest brother Guo: Eldest
brother Niu, my good intention has rescued this wolf, now it actually
must eat me. Should you said? Cow: This! Our Lao Niu gives birth to
must do this for your humanity to do that, drinks or our milk. But we
only eat the worst fodder every day, rest the worst cowshed, you also
had to dig up our cowhide to make money. The old wolf should eat you.
Wolf: (Sneers). Looked you also have any flattery (under cow) (on
farmer) Guo: And so on one and so on, the distant place has come an
old farmer. Asks him to figure out, if he said you should eat me, I
have complied with. Wolf: Good, I give you last the opportunity. Guo:
The old uncle, I has rescued this wolf, it actually ungratefully must
eat me. You said this makes sense? The farmer asks the wolf: Why did
you want to eat your savior? Wolf: He too has been stuffily long me in
the book pouch, almost suffocates me (farmer to take up book pouch,
about about looks at) the farmer: Was this book pouch such small, how
many installs the book all not to be able to install, how installed
under you? Or you demonstrate to me have a look? Wolf: The
demonstration (said on the demonstration, earth-boring auger has
leisurely gone in) the farmer to settle on the time, grips tightly the
book pouch mouth, ties up with the string. The wolf on is stranded in
the inside farmer: Silly scholar, the wild animal eventually is a wild
animal, could not change natural disposition. Is the person surely not
to be able to be excessively benevolent! Guo: (Nod name is) indeed
indeed, declines office e to old age the uncle to teach the farmer:
Then the present, we "solved" it (say. Two people treat the book pouch
to pummel, the farmer also uses the hoe to pound the wolf. The wolf
sends out the sorrowful bugle call in inside, one could not not then
have the sound of something astir) (farmer and Mister Dongguo shook
hand, separates from each other)

The curtain falls, all actor goes on stage.
时间 古代。
人物 东郭先生、狼 、猎人、老杏树，老牛、老农。”
荒野中烟尘滚滚，喊声震天。
内喊：“打狼啊，追啊
（一狼带箭伤上场，）
狼：我本是一只来自北方的狼，无奈今天中箭受了伤
（狼一瘸一拐跑下）
〔东郭先生背着书囊上，边走边摇头晃脑地念诗。）
郭： From a pot of wine among the flowers
I drank alone. There was no one with me --
Till, raising my cup, I asked the bright moon
To bring me my shadow and make us three.
（花间一壶酒，独酌无相亲。举杯邀明月，对影成三人）
（忽然发现路上一群蚂蚁，顿起慈悲之心，已举起的一只脚不忍放下）
郭： （念）走路莫伤蝼蚁命
为人要有慈悲心
（小心翼翼地绕过蚂蚁，继续前行）
（后场喊声大震，）
郭：又发生了什么事？美军又与伊拉克交战了吗？
（狼跑过上来）
狼：大人救命，后面有个猎人要剥了我的皮，救救我吧！
郭：好吧好吧，做人要厚道
（说着，卸下背后的包，把里面的书都倒了出来）
郭：你先躲在这个包里吧
（狼一瘸一拐地钻进包里）
（东郭先生背着书囊，继续走）
（猎人上，）
猎人问郭： 请问秀才，刚才看见一只受伤的狼过去了吗？
郭：没有啊。
猎人：谢谢先生。
（猎人下）
（待猎人走远后，东郭先生把狼从书囊里放了下来）

郭：猎人已走，你快快逃命去吧
狼：不是我不想走，我实在是又累又饿
郭：那你要吃什么？
狼：我要吃你的肉！！（露出凶狠表情）
郭：那你为何要吃我？我有恩与你

狼：因为你把我闷在书囊里太久了
郭：真是好心没好报。不行，我要去找人评理！
（说完，带着狼向前去）
（走到一棵老树下）郭：树大姐，我救了狼，狼却要吃我。你给我评评这个理！
树：该吃！
（狼得意的笑了）
树：你们人类无休止地乱砍乱伐，连我们这些老树也不放过，用火来烧我们。狼为什么不能吃你呢？吃了你就能少个人来祸害大自然了
（老树下，狼慢慢逼近东郭先生）
（这时牛上了）
郭： 且慢，让我去问问牛大哥
郭：牛大哥，我好心救了这只狼，现在它却要吃我。你说该不该？
牛：该！我们老牛生下来就要为你们人类干这干那，喝的还是我们的奶。可我们每天只吃最差的草料、睡最差的牛棚，你们还要扒了我们的牛皮去赚钱。老狼该吃你。
狼：（冷笑）。看你还有什么好说的
（牛下）（农夫上）
郭：等一等，远处来了一位老农夫。找他评理，要是他说你该吃了我，我就遵从。
狼：好，我就给你最后一次机会。
郭：老伯，我救了这只狼，它却忘恩负义地要吃我。你说这有道理吗？
农夫问狼：你为何要吃了你的救命恩人？
狼：他把我闷在书囊里太久了，差点闷死我
（农夫拿起书囊，上下左右看了看）
农夫：这书囊这么小，装书都装不了多少，怎么装的下你？要不你示范给我看看？
狼：示范就示范
（说完，慢慢悠悠地钻了进去）
农夫看准时间，把书囊口扎紧，用绳子绑好。狼就被困在里面了
农夫：傻秀才啊，野兽终究是野兽，改不了本性的。做人千万不能过分仁慈！
郭：（点头称是）的确的确，多谢老伯教诲
农夫：那么现在，我们就把它“解决了吧”
（说罢。两人对着书囊拳打脚踢，农夫还用锄头砸狼。狼在里面发出哀号声，不一会便没了动静）
（农夫与东郭先生握了握手，分道扬镳）

幕落，全体演员上场。
剧本是我自己写的，希望给你帮上忙啊

❹ 搞笑英语话剧剧本

我们班刚演过 ，获得了系里一等奖(孔雀东南飞 英语搞笑剧本) 虽然人物多了一个，可以有群众演员嘛

焦仲卿johnny(jforshort)
刘兰芝lunch(lforshort)
焦母johnny’s mother(jmforshort)
刘母lunch’s mother(lmforshort)
太守之子mayor’sson(msforshort)
强盗burglars(abandc)

prologue 序幕

(j作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,j被打中,狼狈不堪)
j:everybody says that i’m hen pecked, but in fact,i’m a strong tiger,(小声)while my
wife is wusong.
译：人人都说我怕老婆，实际上我是老虎，（小声）我妻子是武松。

(指着上台处的门大声道)i’m not afraid of you!
译：我才不怕你呢！

(内砸出一脸盆,j接住当成盾牌护着头)then, i’m afraid of whom! my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.she is braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me .all this i donot care. i only want she to be tender than me. but she is not! having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!
译：谁怕谁啊！在邻里中，我妻子是最有名气的。她比我勇敢、比我聪明、比我强壮。我也不在乎这些。我只觉得她该对我温柔些，但是她却不懂温柔！有这样的太太就像活在地狱中啊！

(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中j)
my god! who can help me?(下)
译：我的天！谁来救救我啊？

act1 第一幕
(序幕结束时,jm作窃听状)
jm(拄拐棍上):i can!
(对门内)lunch! lunch! where are you?
l(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):i’m here! what’s up ，mum?
jm:i have told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother in law”.
l:ok.my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up?

jm:since you married my son you have be havedso badly.you have been so rude, so brusque,so
lazy……
l:but……
jm:never interrupt me!
l:never interrupt me! since i married your son, that terrible johnny,i have been working hard all
daylong,cooking and washing. i have raised tens of thousands of pigs and cks and chicken
and……
jm:but all those you have done arenot asvaluable as a grandson!
l(生气地挥动着锅铲):oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)go and ask your son. i’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在jm的脸上,下)

act2
(lm坐在台上打毛线,l拿着锅铲上)
l:mum, i’m back!
lm:you are back?why?what happened?
l:i was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.
lm(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):see! i have already told you! when you insisted on
marrying that terrible johnny, i told you that he is ugly tupid and poor, but you did not listen
to me. look at yourself……
l:but,mum……
lm:never interrupt me!
l:mum,i’m not interrupting you. i just want to tell you that you are always right ok? and
i’ll marry whomever you want me to.
lm(大喜):nice girl! just now, i met the mayor’s son in the market.he said:“if your daughter
haven’t been married,i really really want to marry her!”now you are free again, i ’ll go
and tell him.(下)
l(惊愕):what? the mayor’s son?the most famous playboy in the neighbor-hood? (手中的锅
铲掉在地上)what a silly thing i have done!(下)

act3
(j睡眼惺忪上)
j(边走边道):lunch! lunch! where are mysocks?
(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)here they are!(闻一下) er! how smelly! they are still dirty!
(突然想起)lunch has gone! i have to wash them myself.
(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)oh,i’m so hungry! but there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围
裙)this is what lunch always wears! i miss her so much, and her excellent cooking skill! now
she has gone.i have to cook for my mother and myself.
jm(上):where’s my breakfast? where’slunch?hasn’t she got up yet?
j:mum, can’t you remember?lunch has gone!
jm(沉吟片刻):well, to tell you the truth johnny, a son without a wife is suseless. lunch is an ice
girl,go and take her back!
j(立正敬礼):yes madam!

act4
(j开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)
a:hey you!stop and listen to us!
the road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)
b:and i planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)
c:if you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了a的脚)
ab&c:give us all your money!
j(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):is 1mao enough?
(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)
a:what bad luck! this guy is broken!
b:if we cannot robany money today,we will havenot thing to eat tonight!
c:i heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry miss liulan next month.we can go and
rob the wedding!
a&b:good idea!
j(惊讶):what? what? lunch is going to get married? it’s impossible!
ab&c:why? a pretty girl and a richman,what a good couple!
j:but lunch is my wife! we haven’t got divorced yet!
(突然有了主意)i’ve got an idea!you are going to rob the wedding, don’tyou? i’ll go
with you. you take the money and i take the bride.
b:have you got any experience?
j:no. but i’ve got this!(j脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000)

act5
(转眼已到了婚礼之期．ms意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，j盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)
(j和三强盗跃至台中)
abc&j:hey you! stop and listen to us!
a:the road is built by me!
b:and i planted one tree.
c:if you want to go by this street---
j:give us all your money!
(l听到j的声音，掀起了盖头)
l(惊喜万分):johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到j的身边并躲到了的身后)
(ms大怒，挥拳向j打来．j矮身一躲，ms打中了j身后的l，l晕倒)
j(火冒三丈):how dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向ms冲去）
(j与ms混战，jm上，以拐杖击晕ms)
(j将ms胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)
j(扶起l，关切地问):honey, how are you?
l(哭状):i hurt a lot!
j:don’t cry baby.i’ll go and fetch the medicine. (下)
l(起身去追):wait for me! (跑下)